Monday, February 22, 2010

you're gonna miss this.

sila klik sini.


pakcik ni suara dia macho. pakcik ni memang macho pon. huhu.

ok. jangan salah anggap. walaupun taste ak macam pakcik2 tua, ak taknak de rampas bapak korang. tolong jangan salah anggap. bukan taste aku orang tua, taste aku ialah orang yang ada naluri kebapaan ok. paham. mesyi? huhu.

She was staring out that window, of that SUV

Complaining, saying I can't wait to turn 18

She said I'll make my own money, and I'll make my own rules

Mamma put the car in park out there in front of the school

Then she kissed her head and said I was just like you


-Chorus-
You're gonna miss this

You're gonna want this back

You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast

These Are Some Good Times

So take a good look around

You may not know it now

But you're gonna miss this



Before she knows it she's a brand new bride

In a one-bedroom apartment, and her daddy stops by

He tells her It's a nice place

She says It'll do for now

Starts talking about babies and buying a house

Daddy shakes his head and says Baby, just slow down


Five years later there's a plumber workin' on the water heater

Dog's barkin', phone's ringin'

One kid's cryin', one kid's screamin'

She keeps apologizin'

He says They don't bother me.

I've got 2 babies of my own.

One's 36, one's 23.
Huh, it's hard to believe, but ...




lyric dia sgt best2. macam cepatnye masa berlalu.
poom pang, poom pang, tgk2 dah bulan 8. maka cik hur akan jadi 20. fuhh. tua tu. seyes tua.
i wish the time will not fly as fast as this.
bila membe tanya, hur ko bape taun lagi nak abis. and i was like... 4 years and half lagi. gosh. 4 years and a half lagi? rse macam bru semalam jejak kaki kat alex ni. ceh. teringt 1st year plak.

bila dulu2 teringt, nanti dah besar,nak jadi doktor, nak tolong banyak sangat pakcik makcik kat kampung, nak ada kete sendiri, nak ada umah sendiri, taknak dah guna duit mama abah, nak carik yang sendiri punya, belanja diowg shopping plak. nak beli baju cantik2, nak bawak abah mama g jalan2 satu dunia, haihh, macam2 la berangan. and when one day i come to that point, i wonder, what did i really achieved?

bila umur meningkat, maksudnya, kita tak cukup masa lagi. maka use it wisely. tapi again. pakcik trace adkins ni cakap, you're gonna miss everything that you have now. so why dont u take it slow, enjoy every moment, and see how it goes. :) sebab satu hari, what i have now, all my friends that i have now, one day, suma akan pergi membawa haluan masing2. as much as i don't want them too, i don't have choice, have i? nothing lasts forever. jadi, be prepare. tapi takpe. takyah cite2 sedih kat sini. sebab i'll have my own way to go jugak nanti. :) that is what life is all about.

ok. anis dah nak siap masak. maka perjuangan biochem bersambung.

Sunday, February 21, 2010

spread your wings on me. pleaseeee.

ok. dah tenang sikit.
maybe i shouldn't bother much.
maybe, it is a coincidence after all.
definitely. mama pun dah buat hur lega sikit.
let me focus on these last 2 papers.
sebab there's something beautiful awaits me at the end.
something really beautiful







ni ada 3 je. mana lagi sorang kan? hehe. dia tak leh join sebab tak muat.


yang suka baca buku, dan yang suka makan, lagi-lagi skang ni bila da pandai masak sampai asik sumbat mama makan jugak je. kamu kalau nak makan nugget, makan sorang2. jangan sumbat kat mama ngan abah. tak elok. mama ngan abah kene kurangkan minyak. yang kamu pun sama. nak kene banyak penyakit ke nanti? :p tapi kalau banyak exercise, takpe banyak makan. (ececeh kak hur cakap orang, dia pon sama je)

kami berempat ni memang orang tak tau mana satu sulung, mana bongsu. tu yang best tu. hehe. sume sama besar, sama tinggi. ni baru la girls over flowers. azmi's version. since abah pun k-addict kan? hahaha.
yang tak putus-putus mendoakan hur. yang tak berhenti-henti kerja kuat.
tell me, am i not lucky enough? :)
thank you Allah.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

is there something that i missed?

sesuatu
memang ada sesuatu.
tapi saya tak tahu.
dan saya rasa takut dan resah.
macam ada satu petunjuk tapi tak dapat nak ditafsirkan.
atau mungkin hanya satu lagi perasaan,
yang saya tak patut layan.

saya harap ia berhenti. sebab saya sudah penat.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

wish list

mama told me to do a wish list.

write it on a piece of paper, and put it on my wall,
so that everytime i wake up from sleep,
the first thing i see is the things that i wanna be,
a few years from now.

but i don't know why,
i don't feel like doing it.
it's not that i think it's lame, seriously no,
i used to love those kind of stuff,
of course i do,
i love to berangan. hehe
and i don't care of what people think of my wishes,
and i have no problem to make it public.

maybe, i see as my future as unclear for now.
i know i want to be a doctor.
that's all i want to do since i was a little girl.
but that's it. i just don't feel like thinking any further.
or maybe, i just want to keep it to myself.

the diary that used to be my best friend pon dah terabai. haha.
maybe i'm busy and stuff.
or i just dont have the time to berangan anymore.
or berangan is not that fun anymore.
or i am enjoying my real friends so much,
haha. trying to think every possibility, sometimes, i feel it's just a waste of time.

i used to tell someone, diary was my place of telling every secrets and feelings of mine.
now, i guess my secrets are kept inside, and my feelings are poured in to this blog.
which i cannot make everything so public, can i? :P

and when i read all my previous writings in the diary,
since i've been writing for quite a long time,
i realise, the reason i am where i am today,
is because of all my visualisations of my future,
all my berangan punya stuffs,
all my dreams
which i pretty much wrote all of it inside my diary.
that's how i reach up to this level.
by berangan. it works out for me.

bukanlah semua yg i wish to happen tu came true.
in fact, allah granted my wishes in a way that i never ever imagined before.
i said i want to study medic. but never did it crossed my mind it will be in egypt.
i said, i love to have wonderful friends, and never did i thougt the word wonderful is like what my friends are today.
i said, i want to be happy, and that includes all my loved ones to be happy too,
and never did i thought in what ways can all of us be happy.

so, in the end, again, haha, allah knows what's best.
and yes mama, i think i should write it. a wish list of what i wanted to be,
a goal, a vision, a visualisation, a mission,
and i'll try my very best to achieve it,
and let say if i don't, i'll take it as there is always something else better for me.
of course this must be seiring dgn doa dan tawakkal kan. :P

life is short, so why don't you make it seems like it is like a little bit longer? :P

Saturday, February 13, 2010

taggy dari sayang

dah lama tak wat tag2 nii.. rndu la plak. :P


Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 23 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you.
At the end, choose 5 people to be tag
1. sekarang saya tengah exam. dan seperti biasa, you know what exam do to us kan. tapi this time punye exam, i feel tenang. alhamdulillah sgt. tak kesa la pasal result. ketenangan itu, yang susah untuk dicari. :)

2. dulu saya benci nama saya. tapi sekarang saya rasa, saya perlu live up to my name. "HUR" now, that's a big responsibility. :p thnks kepada orang yang memberi nama saya. sekarang baru saya paham. :)

3. currently afgan, afgan, afgan. haha. *blushing*

4. dah tengok hana yori dango berjuta-juta kali. sampai dah hafal.

5. "life is too short"-kata2 mak areqa yang menusuk kalbu bukan hanya saya tapi seluruh housemates. thank you aunty haslina. :)

6. i'm looking forward for my winter hols. so, i can go back where i belong. let me sleep in a long sweet dream for a while and be prepare for sem4 and reality. :p

7. i cry as much as i laugh. maka, kdg2 orang ingat saya gila. sebab sekejap gelak, sekejap nangis.

8. saya jiwang. anda susah?

9. saya suka nyanyi. kalau tak suke, sila pergi. :p

10. saya banyak tido. boleh juga tido di mana jua kalau penat tahap maksima.

11. orang cakap saya baik sangat. saya kata, "mungkin orang lain yang jahat sgt kot" . haha.

12. saya tak suka orang kasihan kat saya. sebab saya tough (bak kata muiz)

13. saya ada 4 girls dalam rumah yang saya sayang walaupun slalu gaduh.

14. saya banyak kawan. tapi kawan2 belakang kuliah handasah is something else, sebab diowg special in their own way.

15. saya tak penah jumpa syeikh yang boleh menarik perhatian saya seperti syeikh yang saya tak tau ap nama dy. omg. kene cepat. kelas dy dah nak start.

16. saya tak suka tipu.

17. saya suka orang yang berterus-terang. they got guts.

18. anis kata, baca microbe macam baca berita.

19. saya sayang sangat kawan-kawan saya. no matter what.

20. saya tak pernah benci orang. saya tak tipu.

21. saya rasa hidup ini sangat indah. so, open your eyes. you might missed important details.

22. saya rindu and sayang sayang sangat kat mama, abah dan 3 mok mok. :p

23. abah saya suruh saya tolong dia kat kebun dia yang dah laen sekarang (bak kata mama saya) saya cakap, it's always my pleasure.

kepada nani yang tag saya. sayang. i love you. i tahu kadang2 i curang. tapi u tetap di hati i. (ayat player tak?) haha. tapi you kene paham la, sebab kasih sayang ni diberi sama rata dengan sayang2 saya yang laen. :p harap sayang paham. huhu


Friday, February 12, 2010

A

A is for Allah

it's amazing.
so amazing.
how so many things happened to you,
how many things that you knew
in just one night,
and it can all change your perspectives of life.

i admit. i'm full of philosophy, and princips,
and yes, my ego is sky high.
but i learned something important today.
something that could contradict with my own identity.
something undescribeable.

thank you for those involved today.
i'm so happy to have you guys in my life.
and i appreciate the open-ness of these people.

and above all, time is always the best solution.
we need time to grow,
to learn,
to feel,
to heal,
to realise,
and allah already put everything in it's order,
who are we to bother?

thank you allah, for all the things that happen to me.
whether it's bad or not.
i really thank YOU for that.
i've learned a lot. a lot.
with every tears that i cried,
i never regret it. not a single drop.
it makes me all stronger. all stronger.
for me to face the real world outside.

and whenever i feel so weak,
feel so alone,
i know i have you Allah.
and i put all my trust on you.
and all my love for people is nothing to my love for you.

because i love, because of Allah.
and that's all i do :)
and only Allah knows what's inside of me.
only Allah knows.

i don't care if people don't trust me,
or hate me,
i won't do the same thing to them.
for i always, always believe that,
the goodness and the bad things are only for Allah to judge.

and because of that, i love to love.
and i won't let a single hatred planted in my heart.
i don't care if i'm hurt, because Allah never leave me alone.
insyaAllah.

and in the end, Allah always know what's best. and i'll never stop believe in HIM.
never stop :)

Friday, February 5, 2010

of all the sweet words and lines.

This is a poem written by me and Hur. For Aina, Aisya and ourselves.

Me : Stars shining on your face
Hur :With a smile i can't embrace
Me :Sweet voice you whisper
Hur :With kind words i hear
Me :Holding hands all day long
Hur :True friends we will stay
Me :Tears we share
Hur :I'll be there
Me :Love is us and it is real
Hello? Is anybody there?
Hur :I'm here now don't you worry
Do not waste tears for a guy like him
I know there is someone out there waiting

Created by Hur and Amy
15 Jan 2007
During Agama

I know its like a tacky poem but haha what the heck we were bored to death. We were in Agama class. Ustaz always aim for Hur and me. So we use to exchange notes to each other.haha. Hur never had guy trouble. I always did for some weird reason the guy i fall for is unique. hehe :) I miss you guys in MRSM so much. You guys had been great. Knowing people like you exist give me hope. I wish you all the best in life though things have changed i have changed. I will cherish our friendship til the end.

This is from amy's blog.
owh my, aku dah takde lagi da all these sweet poems. by time, i think my sweet sweet words pon akn hilang kot. most probably, i don't believe in fairy tales lagi da. as much as i don't want it to be, i'm learning to open up to the real world. the reality.

tapi ble bce balik this poem, it brings me back to the old days. the days when i believe there is true love for me somehow, somewhere. someone. yes. if u call me jiwang skng, dulu lagi teruk.

i dun read text books, i read romantic novels. i love to lepak kat library, but all i do is reading all the mushy poems, and all. and when i was inspired, all i did was jotted it down on my notebook. or yours, or aina's. haha. when someone got her heart's broken, i wrote a line or two, and give it to her so that she knew that, there is always someone else for her.

when all my girlfriends are having real love story, all i do is just dream about it. in my own world. because i just don't like the reality. nak usyar mamat pun, tak kuasa. and then, they went like, hur is sooo picky. and my excuse is always like " i like someone older. matured maybe. " hahaha.

but the truth is, i just like to keep it low. i like my own tiny world. and i'm not ready to share it with anyone.

now that i'm older, haha, i guess a bit matured. i have to stop living in denial. i want to step out of my own world, and have a little bit taste of reality. and yes. reality hurts so much. i might still be a little bit mushy, but i'll save it for the one who really deserves it. and for now, i'm seriously enjoying myself with medic and friends.

owh, and amy, i heard you already have a boyfie. it's great to know that you finally can open up your heart again for someone. but make sure, he's all worth it. huhu.

and amy, the reason that i don't have a guy problem, is because i don't have a guy to go with it. haha. i guess at that time, i was not into it at all. maybe i was jiwang. but that was it. huhu.

and maybe, when i finished with medic and all, or when i'm not so busy anymore, i'll get back to my mushy stuffs. but for now, i'm enjoying reality itself, no matter how hard it is. i'll face it. because i have great friends and family to help me deal with it. and that's all i need. :)

we might had changed, but the memories we had planted in our hearts for life. :)

love you amy, love you gemuk.

to aisya and aina, i miss you and love you as equal as amy. sume dah bawak haluan masing2. but i want you guys to know, i'm still in ssc club. see, i'm a loyal and devoted ahli. :P